Tomorrow

Isaiah 43:18 (The Message)

"Forget about what's happened; don't keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I'm about to do something brand-new.


It's bursting out! Don't you see it? There it is! I'm making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands"...




In no way do I wish to diminish the accomplishment set before my family and in no way am I setting myself above. I am humbly sharing myself with you. I pray that the One who inspired the words written herein, will bring peace and encouragement to all of us. I have walked this path thus far, sharing my trials and success's all along, why would I stop now?






Tomorrow



Until you pass through these waters, you might not understand what I am referencing here. As I write this devotion, I cannot help but think about how tomorrow marks the date to turn the page on this chapter of my life. I think deeply about what tomorrow holds and how different tomorrow will be. Tomorrow, life as I have grown accustomed to, will change. Tomorrow, my husband will return home after being gone for the past 16 months. Tomorrow, Jay will Complete Teen Challenge.



The day I have prayed for, hoped for, believed for, and longed for has come. The day that 16 months ago, seemed like an eternity away, has arrived. Tomorrow, I will make the 3-hour drive from St. Joseph to Colfax, much like I did 16 months ago; only this time, my husband will accompany me home on the return trip. Tomorrow, feet will be put to my professed faith. I will no longer "just believe for the day", but I will revel in the day that has come! Tomorrow, my faith will be put into action.



I am full of emotions and questions. Am I excited? Absolutely! Am I nervous? Absolutely! As I attended church on Sunday, friends asked me if I was excited, to which of course I said, "Yes!" Many went on their way without another thought, but some saw beyond my surface words. They looked deep into my eyes and into my soul, and said, "but.....you're hesitant!" To which I replied, with tear-filled eyes, "yes." Because of their love for me, they shared a bit longer; they prayed for me, they stopped by with ice cream to continue to encourage me; and they reassured me to trust in the Lord! That's what is so awesome about Godly friends, they listen, and they point you to the One who can help the most.



Please don't misunderstand what I'm saying, I am extremely proud of my husband. God ia accomplishing a mighty work in his life. I am thankful, and grateful, and proud! But, the feelings and the questions remain....I believe my husband has changed, but have I?



Will my husband, who is a new creation, be returning to a wife who is the same as when he left?



Will I know how to appropriately turn over the responsibility I have had to take on in my husband's absence?



Just how much do I really trust God??



...."What if"....



This has been a week of battles...battles that attempt to rage havoc in my mind. Here we are, at the end of this journey, but the truth is, this is only the beginning! The beginning of a new chapter; the beginning of a new course; the beginning of blank pages that my husband and I and our Lord have the opportunity to write together.



What are my options? Well, the only option I will allow myself to ponder is the one I KNOW I am equipped to do. With the Lord's help, I will step through this door. Tomorrow, my husband will return home, and we will walk this journey out, together. The truth is: I am afraid; I have apprehensions; BUT, with the Lord's help, I will walk & I will stand!



How will I choose to conqeor my fears?? The answer is: by doing it! Plan and simple. There's no other way. Am I afraid? Yes, but then, I'LL DO IT AFRAID!! God's Word says in Psalm 56:3, "When I am afraid, I will trust in you."



If there's one thing this journey has taught me, it's that I am not to rely soley on my feelings. I have written about, spoke about, and prayed about this day; tomorrow, I will look out the windshield of my life to a new and untraveled highway. I will use my rear view mirror only to remind myself where I've been; I will not gaze into the yesterday's of the past and attempt to drive forward. When you live in the past, you miss out on so much of the present. I will trust the wisdom of the One whose Word promises a "road through the desert."


Thank you for sharing this journey with me!!!