To help walk through this transition time, I have begun a mentoring process with a dear friend. She offers many years of experience and lots of wisdom and spiritual maturity. I am blessed! In meeting with her recently, she sensed the Lord encourage her to share the following scripture verses from 1 Peter 3. First we read it in the NIV version, then the Message and last in the Amplified Bible. I have copied the Amplified version below. As married women, I encourage you to read, and reread the verses out loud and ask the Lord to massage this into your soul. The bold and italic emphasis in verse 2 is mine.
1 Peter 3 (Amplified Bible)
1 In like manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives,
2 When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him--to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband].
3 Let not yours be the [merely] external adorning with [elaborate] interweaving and knotting of the hair, the wearing of jewelry, or changes of clothes;
4 But let it be the inward adorning and beauty of the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible and unfading charm of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which [is not anxious or wrought up, but] is very precious in the sight of God.
5 For it was thus that the pious women of old who hoped in God were [accustomed] to beautify themselves and were submissive to their husbands [adapting themselves to them as themselves secondary and dependent upon them].
6 It was thus that Sarah obeyed Abraham [following his guidance and acknowledging his headship over her by] calling him lord (master, leader, authority). And you are now her true daughters if you do right and let nothing terrify you [not giving way to hysterical fears or letting anxieties unnerve you].
I have begun a word study on the words shared in Verse 2. Just what exactly does reverence mean? What about respect? As God perfectly orchestrates things, just this week I began reading a new book titled "For Women Only" by: Shaunti Feldhahn. Guess what the first chapter is about? Yep, you guessed it, RESPECT. It was eye opening for me and through confirmation after confirmation, I believe that is what I am to share about in this devotion.
In a nutshell, to share a portion of what I am learning: showing respect to my husband has NOTHING to do with how he acts or what he's done. Showing respect is not something he should earn. Showing respect to my husband is a choice I make. Sometimes, I have to consciously make a choice to respect him numerous times throughout the day, and often times, I fail and must ask forgiveness. Nonetheless, I am committed to learn and put this principle into practice.
Just as women have a basic need to feel loved, guys have a basic need to feel respected. In the aforementioned book, the author shares an experiment she observed while at a conference on relationships. The room is divided - men on one side and women on the other. The question is asked, "If you had to choose, would you rather feel alone and unloved in the world OR would you rather feel inadequate and disrespected by everyone?"
The author (who is a woman) shares that she thought to herself, "What kind of choice is that? Who would ever chose to feel unloved?" But, the responses were shocking. The majority of the men raised their hands to indicate they would rather feel alone and unloved than disrespected. Likewise, the majority of the women raised their hands to indicate that they would rather feel inadequate and disrespected than unloved.
So, I asked my husband this question, as if to prove it's validity, again, I was flabbergasted at the response. There is something to this respect thing!!
I know that for women, especially women in our circumstances, you might be asking, "but my husband has put me through so much", or "but I don't trust him", or, "he doesn't respect me, why should I respect him". I have had all of those thoughts myself. BUT, I am compelled to encourage us all to begin to show respect to our husbands, not only when he is present, but when we're talking with our friends and even as we think about them in our thoughts.
No comments:
Post a Comment